A funny kind of yellowness

He wanted you to think that the reason he was lousy at writing compositions was because he stuck all the commas in the wrong places.

What a school. You were always watching somebody cut their goddamn toenails or squeeze their pimples or something.

If that guy was shipwrecked somewhere, and you rescued him in a goddam boat, he’d want to know who the guy was that was rowing before he’d even get in.

What’s the routine on joining a monastery?” I asked him. I was sort of toying with the idea of joining one. “Do you have to be a Catholic and all?

I had (Mrs. Morrow) glued to her seat. You take somebody’s mother, all they want to hear about is what a hot-shot their son is.

I hate saying corny things like “traveling incognito.” But when I’m with somebody that’s corny, I always get corny too.

Romeo and Juliet, at least it was their own fault.

The thing is, it’s really hard to be roommates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs -if yours are really good ones and theirs aren’t.

She called his clarinet a “licorice stick”. Was she corny.

Old Marty was like dragging the Statue of Liberty round the floor. The only way I could even half enjoy myself dragging her around was if I enjoyed myself a little. So I told her I just saw Gary Cooper, the movie star, on the other side of the floor.